Lately, I was ‘lucky’ enough to discover a very old online diary of mine, which I used to write in daily religiously from the age of sixteenish onwards. It was a real eye opener, reading what I got up to on a day-to-day basis at those ages: the people I hung out with, the jokes we had and the many, many boys I claimed to be head over heels in lust with.

It may have sounded dramatic – I went into painstaking detail about a lot of my dates – but then again, I was a wannabe emo kid at that age. So I decided to share some of the most embarrassing entries with you all today because, well, who doesn’t like laughing at that type of thing?!

Formidable Joy | UK Lifestyle Blog | Dating | Confessions of a 17 year old wanna be emo kid | Online dating

He started calling me everynight. He gave me his braclets to wear. He put my picture as his phone background. He put me in his myspace top friends before I put him in mine…

Oh the woes and dramas of Myspace. I wrote this when I met and started seeing a guy (who I’m actually still friends with to this day) and who at the time led me on before getting a new girlfriend. I wrote about the things he did to lead me on; how he was the one putting out all the stops and pursuing me. But the worst part was that he made things almost official by adding me to his top 8 friends on Myspace. FIRST. I only followed suit once he did it, and almost immediately I was replaced by his new girlfriend, my top 8 status long gone. I was so angry. It was like a slap in the face and we all know that being taken out of someones top 8 Myspace friends is the equivalent of blocking someone out of your life entirely these days. I laugh about it now of course but there’s still a bit of aghast there when I look back…ha!

Boys confuse me. B****, this fittie from college, ive spoken to him a few times on myspace and he’s always pretty friendly. I commented his pic and he commented mine back saying ‘You look nice in that dress love x’ and usually I mail him first on there but the other day he emailed me first. But anyway I see him in college, only plucked up the courage to say to him Hi once, but I see him a lot. The other day apparntly at lunch he was proper staring at me and turned right around in his chair to do so at one point. Hmmm confuses me.

There was this guy who went to my college who I was always too scared to strike up conversation with in real life. We occasionally said hi, but as a whole, college was two years of us flirting timidly on Myspace but never making any effort to speak properly. It was a confusing time.

She’s his best mate and he’s in love with her but she doesn’t like him like that..he told me he was nearly over her but. Anyway she got with his mate at the weekend and its caused loads of issues between them so we went downstairs and J**** went upstairs again to talk to her (for about 2 hours :|) and then she came down the stairs and left the house crying.

What even? I had a date with a boy, a girl he was in love with turned up and he left me to have a two hour serious talk with her which resulted in her leaving in tears. AND YET I STAYED. Why did I not just leave? Why the hell would I honestly think it was a good idea to wait or that it was an okay thing for that boy to do that to me?? I hate that boy to this day and still curse him for breaking my heart ladyboner.

Then on the way to reception I was by myself and so was B**** and he saw me and looked away shyly and looked back and smiled and said hey and I was like F*CK YES GET IN THERE lol. Then mamaw was here and he walked out behind me and shimmyed off to look on/investigate the minor crash that had taken place in the car park to which I replied ‘Students’

I tried to act aloof and sophisticated, shaking my head in dismay at bad student drivers. It was also in this entry that my friend claimed the male above watched us play table tennis, laughing when I missed a shot and staring on at my cookies in jealousy/lust. No, cookies is not a enthusiasm. I actually did have cookies.

Hearing from a friend that J**** was seeing someone (b*stard, she’s already number 1 in his top friends. I was in his top friends for what, a day? And I was still the last one and I still had to put him in mine first)

Did I not learn the first time?! This time around, J**** from above (the one who was in love with his best friend) angered me by getting a NEW girlfriend and putting her at NUMBER ONE in his top friends. Blasphemy.

Then I woke up to find SOMEONE had eaten my crisps I bought Monday especially for a crisp sandwhich and there was no dog food so I rung mamaw then rung Janine..she bought the dog food but not the crisps. Nevertheless this put me in a bad mood.

I know this isn’t about boys and actually, looking back, it’s not really over dramatic because I react the same way now when someone eats my food but lolz.

Although I clearly loved the drama at the time, I can’t help but read over (and laugh and cry at) these entries and count myself lucky that I don’t have to deal with this type of sh*t anymore. I mean, sure, up until I met my boyfriend I still used to meet tons of pr*cks that acted like the boys above, but I like to think I’m now a lot wiser to that type of behaviour.

I’ve also learned how to spell properly. Go figure.

Wiser than me and looking to put your practices into motion? Why not try online dating? Free dating sites such as are a great way to meet potential dates.

Just remember remember the five golden rules:

  • I know Myspace doesn’t exist anymore but DO NOT GIVE A CRAP about online stuff/the modern equivalent of top eight friends. If you’re together and he aint willing to show you off online, he aint worth it.
  • If you speak to someone online but not when you see them in real life, GROW SOME BALLS.
  • Don’t fall in love with boys who are in love with their best friend. No good will come of it.
  • Acting aloof sometimes works, but also don’t take the p*ss out of student drivers who crash, especially if you can’t even drive yourself!
  • Hide your treats.

Do you have any embarrassing memories from being a seventeen year old wannabe emo kid? Let me know!

*Please note, this is a sponsored post but all views and opinions are entirely my own.


Since becoming single, I’ve thought a lot about the idea of dating again and, in all honesty, it’s a scary thought! The idea of meeting someone new and having to impress them, having to get over the hurdles of winning them over and doing things like meeting the parents definitely isn’t easy. But it has got me thinking about dating in general and ways I prep for a first date – especially going on a first date in such a long time – so I thought I’d share them with you.

Here’s some go to (and sometimes funny!) ways to prep for a first date.

Formidable Joy - UK Lifestyle Blog | Dating | How to prep for a first date

There’s nothing worse than going on a date and asking those boring questions like ‘so, what do you do?’ only for them to remind you you already discussed that subject last week and had an entire conversation about it. Remembering the basics; name, age, job etc is just being polite! But at the same time, don’t stalk them on social media beforehand or, if you do, at least be careful about it. Leave some things to the imagination so that you actually have some things to talk about on the date.

I go on a lot of dates in London and more often than not, I make an educated guess of how much time I need to get ready and how early I should leave – only to turn up late in a faff, all sweaty and stumbling over my words having rushed. Luckily most people are quite laid back about a bit of lateness – especially in London when it comes to getting the underground – but only to a certain extent and if you don’t take the p*ss. It’s also not a good idea to turn up feeling stressed and rushed about. You want to arrive early or on time, feeling relaxed and confident!

You might have an outfit or two in mind but if you’re anything like me you’ll do your hair and makeup and go to get dressed – only to find that top you wanted is in the wash or that statement necklace that this outfit ONLY goes with is nowhere to be found. Seriously. If you have an outfit in mind, at least take a few minutes a few days beforehand to find everything you need and put it together, just in case something needs washing.

Shave your legs, paint your nails, have a nice relaxing bath – even if you’re convinced you’re just going to meet this guy for a quick drink and there’s not going to be any spark so you’re definitely not going to sleep with him – well, be prepared just in case. Because there’s nothing worse then turning up and deciding that oh, he is actually pretty hot and you wouldn’t mind a bit of fun BUT YOU HAVEN’T SHAVED YOUR LEGS. Plus even if you do decide you don’t like him in that way, putting all that effort in (and probably having silky smooth legs for the first time in months) will give you a huge confidence boost regardless. Shave your legs once for the first time since winter and you’re suddenly channeling your inner goddess. You are the supreme. And all that…

Your first date after a long term relationship can be totally nerve wracking. Have an alcoholic drink before you leave to calm your nerves – don’t drink too much, but if you do happen to accidentally get wasted, don’t sweat it – not everyone is perfect and you’re only young once. If you’re worried that you won’t have anything to talk about, prep some questions in advance and save them on your phone, or visit one of those ‘100 questions to ask a stranger’ websites! They’re always super fun, especially when you’ve had a few. Enjoy the first date butterflies too. Yes they feel kind of weird and make you feel sick, but first date butterflies is also a kind of really beautiful thing too.

This is probably the most important step, especially as so many of us find our dates online these days. You always need to take precautions in case the unthinkable happens – luckily, such cases are very rare, but it’s always better to be safe than sorry. Do give your date a quick Facebook stalk beforehand – just to ensure they’re not catfishing you! Let a friend know their full name and where you’re going on your date. I’d also recommend swotting up on the Ask For Angela scheme – basically, a lot of bars offer you the chance to leave a date discreetly if you go to the bar and ask for ‘Angela’. The bar staff will then get you out of the place and in a taxi safely. You can use this even if you’re date is just coming across ‘just a bit weird’, so it’s a great scheme. If you know where you’re going beforehand, it is worth ringing up to check if the location does this scheme though, as some bars do this by getting you to ask for a certain shot or ask for a different name – so it varies.

These are just some tips to keep in mind when prepping for a date. But there’s always the fun stuff too, like researching cool places to go or the build up beforehand! And don’t forget that if you’re still looking for a special someone for a first date, why not try visiting some dating websites such as dating Lothian, dating County Downdating Edinburgh, dating Birmingham or dating Isle Of Wight? No matter your location, there’s someone (and a dating website!) for everyone..!

What are your pre-date rituals? Let me know!

*Please note, this is a sponsored post but all views and opinions are entirely my own.


Recently, I’ve been very open about my experiences of online dating.

There was once a time when I was slightly ashamed of it and wouldn’t even tell my friends, but then apps like Tinder and Plenty Of Fish came on the scene and all of a sudden everyone was a lot more open about it and the idea of meeting strangers online became the norm.
I also realized that it’s something a lot of us have been doing for a lot of years anyway and meeting strangers (safely!) online kind of goes hand in hand with our generation; we’ve made friends on Myspace, bloggers like myself have bonded via Twitter then met at blogging events in real life and I’ve even discovered bands online which have led me to meeting some awesome people.
There is still a bit of stigma around it though and I can sort of see why. I used to have the notion that if I told people I was online dating, they might think it’s because I’m not pretty enough or approachable enough to meet men in real life. I definitely do not think that anymore though as I soon realized that everyone and their dog was on some form of dating website anyway!
But I digress. Here’s some benefits of online dating if you’re single but still a little cautious about giving it a go.
Formidable Joy | UK Fashion, Beauty & Lifestyle Blog | 7 benefits of online dating | Online dating | Dating
…even when it doesn’t evolve into a relationship. Online dating is pretty great I guess in a way that you sort of already forge some form of connection before meeting in real life and that connection doesn’t just go away if things don’t work out, so many people often go on to become friends afterwards. This wouldn’t happen if you just gave your number to someone in a club. Similarly, you could also make contacts this way. I’ve made contacts in music, graphic design and photography in the past, which is pretty cool.
For a while, I used online dating apps and websites just to go on dates and not necessarily for a relationship. This led to some real fun dates which is often one of the best parts of being single. Some of my most fun dates included going to an Arctic Monkey’s gig, spending the day along Southend seafront and drinks at the quirky underground 1940’s themed bar, Cahoots. 
I used to be so shy and that’s part of the reason why I turned to online dating. I could never approach a guy unless I was drunk and on a night out, but online I found myself coming across as super confident and this paid off in my favour. I think this helped me become more outgoing in real life too, especially as the messages exchange online often led to meeting in real life. Also, heading down to Southend to meet a stranger for a first date was way out of my comfort zone, but it paid off and I ended up dating said guy for around six months. 
Even though I know plenty of people that have forged relationships through the use of Tinder, it is still an app that is often considered the most playful of all of them and you’re never judged for whatever you’re looking for on there. If you don’t want a serious relationship or just want to dip your toe into the world of online dating, apps like Tinder can always lead to a bit of fun!
Strangely enough, I’ve had more relationships/’dated’ more people online than I’ve had ‘single first dates’ (if that makes sense), which is weird when a lot of people think online dating is used for people looking for just one thing. I’ve been with my boyfriend for just under seven months now and in that time we’ve gone to Blackpool, Brighton and even Romania together (I’d never have seen myself visiting such a beautiful country before meeting Vincent!) and are super happy and in love. The proof is in the pudding = online dating does work.
Want your friend to set up your profile for you and find some dates? There’s a website for that. Actually looking for something long term and serious rather than just fun? Take your pick of many websites aimed at those being a bit more serious with their choices. You can also find websites such as a Bedfordshire dating site (perfect if you really want to look local), over 50s dating, over 50s dating Northamptonshire, and, again websites that are more area specific; a Tayside dating site and over 50s dating Tayside. No matter what you’re looking for, there’s bound to be a website or app for you.
Meeting strangers these days isn’t what it used to be. A lot of websites do necessary checks when allowing people to sign up and you usually get a good feel of a person and their character before meeting in person. That said, many websites recommend some safety measures too, such as meeting in a public place and letting someone know beforehand where you’re going to be. Like I said, luckily it’s more accepted these days so there should be no embarrassment with telling a friend that you’re off on a date with someone you met online, and lots of people have a get-out plan with their friend in case the date isn’t going as well as planned! Plus, who can forget that bar from St Albans that went viral last year for the notices in their toilets offering daters a subtle way to leave the bar in case they felt any unease on their date…
Will you be giving online dating a go or have you in the past? Let me know with a comment!
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*Please note, this is a sponsored post but all views and opinions are entirely my own.